Letters; Not Blogs (from your EMDR Therapist Florida)

Hey mamas,

As I was getting the finishing touches on a tattoo yesterday and dreading returning to work at home, I realized I get to decide what I want to do, and I don’t need anyone else’s permission to do it. 

Receipts

Let me back up. 

After a few weeks of scheduling chaos (moving, traveling, back to school, etc.), I finally have a few days to get shit in order in my business and at home. On the business end, one of those tasks was/is writing blogs for the month ahead. It is ALWAYS the last thing to do on my list because….I hate it. It’s not that I don’t have things to say or information I want to put out there, but the whole idea of writing out something that feels so clinical (even though I try hard not to make it sound so clinical) and salesy, which doesn’t feel like me. As I’ve shared before, my goal in my adult life has been to show up as the most genuine and authentic version of myself, and my blogs have felt like the antithesis of that.

So, all of this was on my mind when I took a break from work to make my tattoo session. (I love tattoos, and this was the final phase of a piece. So excited!) While the artist was doing his work, I was able to zone out and found myself dreading going home to work on these fucking blog posts that I felt I had to do to market myself and my practice. I was also reflecting on my sessions from the week and how one conversation was a good reminder to me: we don’t need permission to do something we need or want to do for ourselves. The epiphany happened when the two trains of thought combined in my head and I realized I don’t need “permission” to do something different in my business, and the something “different” is blogging. 

I immediately relaxed. It was huge! This shift in my body helped me realize I was on the right track. I still want to show up for myself and my practice, and my mamas. The idea of writing letters popped into my head, and I let that play out for a while, and it felt right in my body. In order not to forget this brilliance, I immediately sent myself an email because the biggest lie I tell myself every day is, “I don’t need to write this down. I will remember it later.” 

So, here I am the following morning, writing my first letter. I’m not sure how this is going to proceed. If these letters are going to be short or long, profound or silly, meaningful to others or just me. Probably a combination of all of the above. I just know I don’t feel panic, stress, or dread about the idea of it, and that is good enough for me right now. 

For those struggling with the idea of needing “permission” from others to do what feels right for yourself in your mind and body, I get it, and I see you. It is something we are taught as children and is necessary, but with the transition to adulthood, the need to shift this idea can get lost in the process. I feel like this is especially true for women, if our female role models reinforced the idea or demonstrated they needed “permission” from their partners or parents to do what they needed for themselves or to make any decision at all. 

Just know, it doesn’t have to stay that way. You can break the pattern for yourself and others. If I can help, just let me know.

Amity

EMDR Therapist Florida